She Is More Precious Than Jewels/ A Birthday Tribute

I never thought I’d be writing this post, She Is More Precious Than Jewels/ A Birthday Tribute, this year.  I always expected my Mum to live forever. Unfortunately, the Pandemic happened and Mummy sailed into the sunset.

Read about my 75th Birthday Tribute to Mummy here

Birthday Tribute/Mother Of Mine/ Layered Rainbow Cake For A 75th Birthday

Gladys Elisha 1935-2021

She Is More Precious Than Jewels/ A Birthday Tribute

On the beach in Terengannu

Mummy in KL

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She is more precious than Jewels

Mummy was the third child  of Theodore & Wilhelmina Soans of Kundapur.  She was a strong and courageous women. As far back as I can remember, she had a steadfast faith and belief in God. She studied Home Sc & Nutrition and International cuisine and married my Dad in 1957. Our Dad was born and brought up in Lahore and a brilliant personality. He was also very sentimental and I remember him showing me his wedding buttonhole which he had pressed within the pages of a fat book.  It was a spray of honey suckle and Mummy’s bouquet was the same.

We had a wonderful childhood that came to an end abruptly when our Dad passed away suddenly in his early 40’s. Our house was filled with people known and unknown. Many of them helped themselves to our things. I don’t know how she dealt with all this, but I do remember her strength and calm. She was our refuge throughout.

She chose to settle in Mangalore because she felt safe and she had family and friends there. Many of these ignored her ( we were no longer VIP’s) and others ganged up with neighbours and gave us hell. She became very reserved after this.  She still remained strong and her faith is God was unshakeable. (Our angels at that time were some neighbours who became good friends and we are still in touch today.)

We hated living in Mangalore and were eager to move to Bangalore. Ma promised she would do so when were old enough.  So when I finished my Pg we moved to Bangalore and we were very happy.  Unfortunately we had an Iraqi neighbour who went out of his way to harass us.  Again her strength came through as Ma decided to shift house. The person who helped us at that time was the late FS Macwana. That same day, he arranged for us to see a flat which a church member owned. The deal was struck and we stayed there happily for many years. And Nehru & I were able to host Shanthi & Rev when they visited KL many years ago. We are very grateful for their timely support.

Ma belonged to a generation that excelled in everything she did and she taught us to do the same. Whether it was cooking or gardening or arts and crafts or singing, we did it all and enjoyed it immensely. Once all of us, including my brother had to embroider cross stitch cushion covers for a set she was making for Christmas. And I have one of those covers with me. Our parents always encouraged us to do our best and never to compete with anyone.  Rather, we were taught to appreciate that and learn from them.  This has been my policy throughout and I taught my children the same.  Both our parents came from very mixed backgrounds and taught us to be tolerant of others irrespective of colour or language. We were taught to respect every one, no matter what their position in life. She taught us the value of integrity and honesty.

Ma was extremely generous and this is one trait I am glad we inherited from her.  She was always giving gifts to others. When she visited Malaysia she was so happy buying things for her family, friends and The Ark and accumulated excess baggage of 20kgs. So she left her things behind instructing me to bring it on our next visit and had a great time distributing her gifts to everyone. In fact when my daughters travel, they do the same thing.

She was a fabulous cook.  Growing up we ate a lot of things at home that others had never heard of.  Ma was also a very talented baker, organiser, sewed exquisitely and made many of our clothes. She loved knitting and made beautiful sets for both my baby girls. All four of us are good cooks today because of her. We never bought birthday or Christmas cakes. Our parents made them. She loved to donate stuff for the various bazaars and church sales and her standard donation was 100 vadas and 100 pieces of coconut sweet.  We loved helping her as we got to eat the odds and ends. Over the years we learnt to do the same. She was also very stylish and passed on her tastes to us.

Both parents insisted we sing in the St. Mark’s Choir as children.  She sang soprano in the BMA with my Dad when he was the President and made sure we continued singing in the choir in Mangalore. In fact our pocket money depended on that.  When we returned to Bangalore my sisters and I joined the BMA and that is where I met my husband.  I am ever grateful for that.

In short, she was the epitome of grace and faith and strength.

On that terrible day when she passed away, angels appeared out of the blue and helped my sisters and Serita arrange the funeral.  Our heartfelt thanks to everyone especially Anne Morris and the Angels of Mercy who made it possible for our Mum to be buried with dignity.  We are very grateful that our daughter Serita was there with Mummy right to the end even though we could not be there. God in his mercy was good to her and to us, showing us again that He is in control.

Mummy, it’s so hard to believe that you are not a phone call away; RIP until we meet in heaven.

My Tribute At The Women’s Fellowship of St. Mark’s Cathedral, Bangalore

“She is more precious than jewels.”

My Mum was a very strong woman and a multi-faceted one.  She taught us to excel in everything we did and has been the corner stone of our family for 50 years.  Nowhere was this more apparent than in the Women’s Fellowship of St. Mark’s of which she became a member soon after her marriage in 1958.  She participated in all their activities, whether it was singing, play acting, contributing , raising funds or just attending their various meetings and pot luck dinners.  Looking back, I remember the numerous things she contributed for the Church sales.  Her standard contribution was 100 vadas ( the chatambadas) and 100 pieces of coconut-cocoa sweet.  At other times, it was embroidered and painted pillow cases, hand towels, handkerchiefs, and at one time tiny little pots with attractive cacti which were snapped up in minutes. We loved helping her and as we grew up we learnt to do the same. She belonged to an era where women were the foundation of the family. I thank and praise God for her life and for being a strong woman.  May she RIP until we meet again.

Ranita’s Tribute ( Her Grand-daughter)

I remember how you’d insist we have have tea time together after we played, your numerous biscuit jars, your shawls, hairclips, and beautiful sarees, and how I used to steal your Complan when you slept in the afternoon. I also remember the stories you told me about your childhood and how you loved watering the garden every day. Your dedication to watching serials was unparalleled to any other. You shaped my childhood in so many ways

Words don’t express the pain, we love you and miss you

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